Chapter 8, The Long Ditch Flows Silently Under the Moon (Part 4)
Her gaze suddenly brightened slightly, as if two tiny star-like flowers had momentarily shone. She managed to break into a difficult smile, a smile that belonged to a generation of beauties, the last, unparalleled and tragic smile, blooming like a night-blooming cereus, magnificently unfolding amidst the flickering of a solitary lamp: "Very good... The daughter of the Liu family... finally... no longer... has to die for love..."
Looking at the familiar and tranquil lights, with no crowd and no cries, I felt a sense of relief; perhaps I had been overly concerned. Suddenly, I saw the courtyard gate being hurriedly opened, and Han Bi rushed out without even mentioning the lanterns. My heart skipped a beat as I hurried over.
The daughter can no longer speak, yet she struggles, forcing out a few intermittent words from her blood-stained and hollow breaths: "... Promise me... to live bravely... don't... suffer..."
I have calmed down, and I have preserved the last breath of my mother with my obsession. This is my way of loving her; we are forever together
I stopped, suddenly turned around and rushed back, grabbing my mother's hand: "What did you say? I am listening, I am listening!"
I stared blankly at the ground, where purple-black blood was everywhere, the bloodstains extending straight to the bed. The end of an autumn fragrance-colored silk ribbon hung down softly, soaked in blood. Following that ribbon, I saw my mother’s waist; the matching belt had already shattered. My mother, her collar disheveled, long hair cascading down, was covered in blood. Her complexion, that frost-white color that had startled me that afternoon, had turned into a deathly pale. Her lips, however, were dark purple and difficult to open, blood still gushing from between her teeth.
Although I do not understand medicine, I know that if a person loses this much blood, it is nearly impossible for them to survive. If my mother were to pass away in this very moment, I would not even be able to see her one last time
I can no longer stand up, feeling as though I am trapped in a deep nightmare. I weep as I crawl forward, delving deeper into the nightmare. Tears gush forth like a spring, as if I am to drain my entire life of tears, flowing ever more urgently, soaking my clothes and wetting the ground, blending with the patches of blood that were already drying. My knees drag along, creating a long, winding trail of blood.
I suddenly bent down and gently pressed my lips against my mother's.
I screamed hysterically: "Why aren't you saving her, just watching her bleed? Han Bi, go find a doctor for me, the best doctor in the侯府 and in the whole city, go find them together!"
Seeing that trace of blood, I suddenly recalled the things I have been enduring yet truly wish to pursue
Her voice gradually faded, low enough that I had to lean closely beside her lips to discern it. When the last syllable of the word 'death' dissipated into the air, I heard my mother exhale a faint sigh.
When I became more alert, I realized I was tightly gripping Han Bi's hand, shouting hoarsely: "What happened to my mother? Quickly tell me what happened?"
In the midst of great difficulties, Aunt Yang suddenly sighed and said softly: "Miss, listen to the lady's words, do not leave. No one wishes to abandon her; she too wants to strive to live for you. However, it is ultimately impossible to be with Tu Shu."
The mother on the pillow, tears flowing rapidly: "... ... Useless ... ... Don't be willful ... ... There isn't much time ... ... You listen to me first ... ... "
I spat out a mouthful of blood and collapsed beside my mother
I suddenly jumped up: "I will save you first. After saving you, I will have a lifetime to listen to you speak!" I immediately ran outside, but as I lowered my head, I suddenly saw dark bloodstains on the ground, and I came to a halt.
With a painful cry, I didn't even know what I was shouting, and I collapsed to the ground.
Within my body, the subtle pain in my internal organs, which I had felt during my earlier frantic run, suddenly erupted into a chaotic clamor due to my current calmness and numbness. I endured the chilling pain that felt like a small knife stirring within me and calmly asked Aunt Yang: "What exactly is wrong with my mother"
Han Bi hastily wiped away her tears and grabbed me, rushing towards the courtyard: "Madam told me to hurry and find the young lady... otherwise it will be too late..."
Wait, the illness... I suddenly straightened up and grabbed Aunt Yang: "Tell me, quickly tell me, what illness does Mother have? Mother has medicine, I saw someone delivering medicine to her, and also, summon the doctor, summon the doctor, hurry and summon the doctor!"
Aunt Yang opened her mouth, hesitated for a moment, and was just about to speak when she suddenly heard the sound of hurried footsteps approaching the inner room
Aunt Yang, sitting in front of the couch, turned around with tears streaming down her face, her voice filled with infinite age: "Miss... come to see the lady for the last time."
We all looked out the door, and with a loud crash, hetushucom.com, the door was flung open, revealing both my uncle and my godfather standing outside.
The light in her eyes has already begun to fade, and in those once radiant eyes, the clear spring water will inevitably dry up this night. I can feel her breath slowly dispersing into the suddenly damp and cold air, sensing the wind outside the courtyard turning suddenly fierce, carrying the scent of moisture and the long-buried earth beneath the darkness, gradually moving into this room, pressing down like a heavy black mist, causing the candlelight to flicker and threaten to extinguish.
When Han Bi saw me, she was momentarily stunned. Before she could speak, tears had already begun to flow down her cheeks. A loud thud echoed in my heart, and I felt as if everything before me had turned into a white blur, instantly rendering everything unclear. In the midst of this chaos, a voice kept ringing out: "Something has happened, something has happened, something has happened..."
For her, I will live well
The short distance from the door to the bedside has exhausted all the strength of my life. I hope it ends soon, yet I also wish it would never come to an end
Oh, I said softly: "Then where is my father?"
This final breath resides within my chest, from now on, my mother's essence will forever accompany me, our breaths will intertwine, continuing to savor the splendor and sorrows of this vast world together, regardless of the storms and tribulations, in this life and the next, we shall never be separated, she no longer has to leave me forever, as long as I still draw breath, she will be with me.
Finally moved to the bedside, I gazed at my mother through tears. She still had a breath left, knew I had come, yet was unable to turn her head to look at me. Her fingers moved slightly, searching for my hand. I hurriedly extended my own hand, and that fleeting warmth filled me with unbearable sorrow. This was my mother's last body heat. After tonight, after this moment, I will never be able to touch it again in my lifetime
Uncle's face was pale, his lips trembled as he stammered: "W-w-what's g-g-going on..."
However, an unusual flush suddenly appeared on the face of the godfather, blooming like the evening glow and instantly staining his somewhat pale complexion. He suddenly bent down and began to cough, the cough growing heavier and more urgent, until finally, faint traces of blood appeared at the corners of his lips
The two individuals were struck dumb as if by a thunderbolt upon seeing the scene inside the room
Aunt Yang had already taken up residence when Mother passed away. Seeing me draw in Mother's last breath, she was taken aback and wanted to intervene, but ultimately remained silent and gave up. At that moment, she adjusted her clothing and respectfully bowed to Mother, saying: "Madam, this old servant should accompany you, but I cannot bear to leave the young lady. She is not yet of age, and I cannot abandon her to enjoy comfort without someone to care for her. Rest assured, Madam, I will do everything in my power to take good care of the young lady."
With a serious expression, he turned to me and said, "Miss, the lady died from a recurrence of an old poison. This poison was inflicted during the attack on the Yuanliang King in Qujing, Yunnan. At that time, upon learning that your father had remarried, the lady, in a fit of anger and despite being pregnant, secretly accompanied Lord Mu to the battlefield. As a result, she was accidentally poisoned with a curse. Over the years, everyone has exhausted their efforts, searching far and wide for effective remedies, but ultimately, no medicine has proven effective."
Tightly grasping my mother's hand, through tear-filled eyes I heard her faint breath: "Huaisu... do not blame your mother for sending you away..."
My heart was filled with fear, and I resented her slow pace. I pushed her away and rushed towards my mother's chamber, but upon reaching the door, I suddenly came to a halt
Stumbling along the way, I turned into the corridor, passed the artificial hill, and the white stone ground of the West Ping Marquis's residence was urgently echoed by the hurried footsteps of my night run, while ahead, the Cangya Courtyard was in sight
Han Bi was shedding tears, desperately bowing down underground: "Yes, yes, I will go, I will go..."
I was so shocked that I could hardly believe my eyes, Mother, my eternally noble and pure Mother, I have never been in such a wretched state in this life, unless she has endured unspeakable suffering!
I suddenly stopped crying, placing my hands over my mother's gradually cooling hands: "I swear, I will live well, in this life, without dependence, without compromise, without indulgence, without hesitation, and live bravely!"
Mother! My mother, who devoted herself tirelessly and thought of me until her last breath
In the afternoon, within the pavilion listening to the wind, a flash of bright red from the corner of a robe, lifted by the breeze, suddenly darted past my eyes. I began to tremble slowly, unable to believe that my mother had fallen ill at that moment
I was suddenly jolted, realizing where my earlier strange feelings had come from. My mother did not like to punish me by making me kneel; she said, "What daughter does not have gold beneath her knees?" More often than not, when I had erred, I was confined to my own room to copy texts. My mother would never punish me by making me kneel outside the Cangya Courtyard; she believed that disciplining a daughter need not be displayed for others to see. Today, however, my mother was acting unusually, clearly wanting to send me away, unwilling for me to witness her desperate struggle in her dying moments, leaving an indelible shadow of pain for this lifetime.